What your daughter should think about when she's not feeling confident

Is your daughter thinking about all the things that could go wrong in her next game? 

👉 What if I fail? 

👉 What if I play terribly?

👉 What if I don’t make the lineup?

👉 What if I look dumb? 

These lies she’s believing and making her not feel confident. It’s the worst. And I know you’re just as frustrated seeing her keep doing this to herself. 

Rather than telling her to stop thinking like this, let’s shift the focus to what she should and could be thinking about instead! 

First of all, remind her that these negative thoughts, doubts, worries, fears… they are NORMAL! She is a normal athlete for feeling and thinking these things. She is a normal girl, a normal human! 

Bad news… these negative thoughts, doubts, worries, and fears are going to continue, especially after failures, mistakes, bad games. It’s just our competitive nature! 

Good news… she is in control of the thoughts she chooses (it just takes practice). 

Baby steps here.

#1: Just start by asking her to notice when she’s saying or thinking about these negative thoughts.

#2: Help her come up with a better thought, something she can choose when she notices (is aware) of when she is being negative. 

Here are some examples of affirmations (these are actually the affirmations that make up a Confident Athlete in my program): 

I am STRONG. I am BEAUTIFUL. I am in POWER. I TRUST myself. I CHARGE forward when things get tough. I trust my GUT. I love CHALLENGES. I can do anything I set my MIND to. I EMPOWER others around me. I LEAD with purpose. I bet on MYSELF. I am a DREAMER and a DOER. I make a DIFFERENCE and I am IMPORTANT. I choose HAPPINESS. I am a WARRIOR in competition and life. I am CONFIDENT.

If she doesn’t believe in her affirmations right away, it’s OKAY! Again, it takes practice, just like she practices week to week with her team or on her own physically. 

This week’s Mindset Lesson is covering exactly this: What to think about when you’re not feeling confident! 

Since I’m on maternity leave, it’s a recorded lesson with a study guide for her to PRACTICE this (key thing here). 

You can grab the lesson and even do it with her HERE!

Remember, focus on what you want to think about rather than what you don’t! 

💕 Paige